Em wrote:

Then the problem lies with her and not you, if after only 2 days she could allow herself to be affected by such a thing. Don't eat yourself up over it... You were honest and told her the truth and that's the right thing to do so don't worry about it.

This is literally nothing, it sometimes feels like you're making so many unnecessary problems and challenges for yourself (and us) to deal with

He is. Don't you realize the now and then challenge? Makes me curious actually, but i have to many things to do and don't want this "sudden challenges" initiated by certain people drained by positive vibe.
He's a grown up man.
So, grow up and man up, TIMU.
Sorry if i'm being straight forward to the point of blunt.
Some people have to learn to grow up and exercise their faith. Remember the lazy mentality that Mclenie posted about?
You should read it, TIMU.
I would love to help you with the advice, TIMU. When you really need it, not when you constantly needing one.

*Deleted

It was 2 days she'll get over it, lol

Sam wrote:

ThisIsMyUsername wrote:

And does it make it any harder to be with her if I was just a rebound? To attract her back?

No, it doesn't make it harder. The only thing that makes it harder is you refusing to let the past go. Do you understand that by repeating the same details that you are keeping them active? If you want your future to be different then you have to change now. Stop reacting and start creating.

Thanks Sam. As always, I really appreciate it.

*Deleted

So I got advice from my sister to give other people a try and try casual dating. I just want to feel better.

So I gave this girl a shot two days ago, light dating. And i feel super guilty. She got infatuated and clingy fast. I didn't know I'd affect her that much... today I had to tell her I cant do this as I still love my ex, which worried me because of how attached she was after just two days...I feel like I was given bad advice because I just feel really guilty now and it's hurting her...


It also helped me realize that... some of the way Im acting and doing toward her is the same stuff my ex had done to me early on... she was just out of a relationship to. She said that she can't continue because it felt like she was "emotionally cheating" on her ex... I only realized this after I said the same thing to this girl...

does that make me a rebound for my ex?:/
And does it make it any harder to be with her if I was just a rebound? To attract her back?

I am so overburdened with everything going on in my life. My parents are getting out of town, because they can't handle me asking for help, it leads to us getting into arguments. I don't have anyone to talk to... anyway, the reason I brought this up is because I was venting about it to my closest 2 friends (they're video game buds I met online. Sad right? That's how antisocial and just to myself I've been since this whole thing) and I was venting while talking to one of them via a mic, over a video game system, and saying, "I just wish everything were as it were a year ago! Classes were going well, for the most part, I had a good job," and one of them cut me off and yelled, at me, angrily the following:

"DUDE. SHUT THE FUCK UP. STOP BEING A LITTLE BITCH AND MOVE THE FUCK ON. *GIRL'S NAME* DOESN'T HAVE ANY FEELINGS FOR YOU. SHE TOLD YOU STRAIGHT UP. LIFE ISN'T A VIDEO GAME, YOU CAN'T GO BACK. SHE'S NEVER GOING TO BE WITH YOU. LOOK AT HOW SHE'S BEEN TOWARD YOU. SHE'S PROBABLY ALREADY BANGING ANOTHER GUY. GROW SOME FUCKING BALLS AND MOVE THE FUCK ON!!! JESUS CHRIST!!"

I unplugged the mic and started breaking down, crying. I was doing well today, and I didn't even bring that up at all! In months to them! That hit me like a fucking dagger, and my vibe is suddenly at an all-time low. I was feeling great earlier today. Guess that can't FUCKING last long. Also now there's a fucking hole in the door of my room because I was so pissed and upset at what he said, I threw a shoe at the door. My fault. I get it. But last time that happened, my dad called the cops on me, after I told him there's a hole in the wall. And my expensive computer which cost roughly 2000 dollars just... stopped working. 

THANKS UNIVERSE! I'm already the family's FUCKING punching bag, this is nothing new to me. Appreciate it! 

Thank yo guys)

So I don't know why but I always now wake up in a terrible place, emotionally. I feel almost disconnected from reality and that sense sort of lingers throughout the day. It must be depression though. I don't even have any sign that she even acknowledged my call, but im trying to stay positive.


My question is, I know that chemically, depression can become an addictive feeling. Your brain becomes addicted to the feeling, even if you don't want to be... if i "fake it until I make it" with trying my best to be happy and positive, will that eventually become real positivity? I find that if I watch Veronica's videos for example, I get happy, but it's temporary. Im asking because I cant find a genuine place or reason to be happy without her, not knowing what she's up to or who she's speaking with, what she's doing throughout the day, etc... so if I pretend to be happy (will, I cant say its "pretending", but it's like tm really trying to force it - like saying positive affirmations over and over for an hour, for example. I guess "training" would be a better word to use), will the happiness eventually be there? I've got a block somewhere, having to do with this girl and its really taking its toll on me (making me feel insane and so depressed), and I can't exactly pin point it. And I guess the only thing that really helps is "trying to force myself" to be happy until I'm happy in the moment.


Since I can't cut through this blockage, at all, (the blockage is caused by not having what I had with her I know that. I just don't know "what exactly" the blockage is if that makes sense. But it causes me to feel just... not in reality, and a sense of hopelessness and incredible grief) would it be alright to try to talk myself into believing she's coming back for example? Trying to force myself to believe it? And at the same time trying to force myself to be positive, almost starting as a "pseuso-positivity"?

Just wondering because I honestly feel as if I can't live without her, due to this blockage, but when I try to force myself to be happy, or usually eases that feeling just a little bit.

I hope this made sense haha!teeing SO hard to stay positive and not look at my outer reality (maybe I'm just scared of having false hope, and scared of finding out this may not work, after living in hope, causing me to be even more let down and depressed haha! Im trying to build that faith in the LoA though!)
Thanks so much