Blissful, I still haven't completely read what you have written because I am not getting enough time as every member of my team at my workplace is on leave due to festivals and I am the only person handling things.
I will read it as soon as I get time.

Good luck everyone and I thank you all!!!!

Aphrodite11 I came across this and thought of your post, I thought maybe you could benefit from this exercise it sounds powerfully healing.

Kind of unorthodox approach for this sub but this is how I found "success" in manifesting. I DON'T manifest anymore. I stopped. There was a shift.I tried to deliberately "manifest" for YEARS and was always frustrated. I had success here and there but ultimately I was left always longing for more...never feeling fulfilled or like I "had it down".Then I learned to love myself. And not in the "woo-woo, FB quote with hearts" type of way. In a real and practical way. Where each day, I listen to my inner conditioning like a little child who is trying to get my attention. I accept and deliberately LOVE everything it has to say and everything it feels. No matter what the emotion or thoughts, I love and accept it and tell it that all emotions are welcome here and that it is allowed to feel and have any thought it wants. Totally open to its need to express whatever it wants. I FEEL every emotion and allow it to be experienced. Then 99% of the time, the emotion (resistance) leaves me....on its own accord. That's it.Since I have started doing that on a CONSISTENT basis. By that, I mean that every single morning I have this conversation with my inner child (ego/mind/conditioning/beliefs) and my higher self (unconditionally loving parent, soul...whatever you want to call it). And I do it throughout the day. I allow the feelings to be felt and come up.Since this shift, manifestation has been NOT NEEDED. Things come very quickly from this space. I mean, very quickly. I do set intentions every morning for what my goals and desires are. But I am not attached to them. I basically just direct my focus for the day with them....but know that they will come in their own time ...or not.The thing is...manifesting is a way to give ourselves what we think we need...and what we think we want...to make ourselves happy. By loving myself, in this deliberate, practical and consistent manner....I went straight to the source of the unhappiness....ME. And I love her. And she felt better. My anxiety went WAY down. And she didn't need things to be happy anymore.ANDDDDD....with that...from that space, everything I have ever wanted started to roll in. See, this is the paradox of manifestation....being in that space of being the feeling that you are seeking from the thing you want to manifest.

THE ACTUAL PROCESS:Super simple. And may seem a bit challenging. Every day. Repeat. EVERY DAY.Journal the following. (this is just to start you out) CONVERSATION WITH INNER CHILD (IC) & HIGHER SELF (HS) (example)

PART 1 - Inner Child Rant/Experiencing FeelingINNER CHILD (IC): I am so angry about _____. I am so sad about __. *** I hate the way my life is going...it should be _______.***(Note: This is full on whatever you are thinking and feeling. NO holding back. Let er rip as I teach my clients. Big feelings here and no trying to make them sound nice & pretty. Seriously, the point is to allow this feeling TO BE FELT...so have at it. As I journal, these rants can go on for paragraphs and paragraphs. There is no time limit and the ego/inner child (ic) may be shy at first but once it gets going, it will feel so good to release. I often have tears when I do this....just go with whatever happens. The emotions that are coming up are there because they need to be loved so let them tell their full story. Let them tell how they were hurt and abused and victimized. All of it. Let them be illogical or whatever. Imagine them as little children coming at your back door and knocking, begging to be let in and heard. And you are the kind parent at the table with a warm cookie and a glass of milk and an ear.

PART 2 - Higher Self/Source/Unconditional Parent ReplyHIGHER SELF (HS): I love you. I am here for you. I am not going anywhere. I will not try to fix anything you are saying. I will not try to get you to believe anything I say. You are not wrong. You are safe. You are safe. You are safe. You are safe to feel any emotion you want to with me. I am not leaving you. I am not leaving you. No matter how sad, how mad, how angry, how horrible....I AM NOT LEAVING YOU. EVER. You can not get rid of me. I am here. I am finally here. And I am so sorry I have left you alone for so long to try and deal with all of this. I didn't know any better but I am still so sorry. I love you. I love you. You are safe. You are safe.

PART 3 - Back and Forth ConversationIC:HS:IC:HS:IC:HS:Now, be aware that the first time you do this, your inner child is going to pull a big ole "bull shit" flag. Because it knows that you might just be doing this to get it to stop freaking out or being sad. That you are listening just to get it to shut up. (just like kids know when an adult is sincere about really wanting to hear what they are saying or want something from them). This is okay. Just keep going. (mine totally did this the first time, she didn't trust me at all, with good reason) If the IC comes up with something like this:IC: F-you. I hate you. I hate you so much. You don't love me. You never loved me. You just want me to do what you want. You want me to stop messing things up for you.
Then you want to come back as HONEST as you can. There is no right way but really be sincere and honest. Maybe something like this.HS: You are right. I just want you to be quiet. I want you to stop doing what you are doing. And I am sorry. I don't know how to do all of this. I just know I love you. I love you and I want to hear you maybe for the first time ever. I want you to know I am not leaving you. I may not get it right all the time, but I am not leaving you. You are safe with me. Even in my mistakes, I will love you forever. You are love. I am love. I can not NOT love you. It is impossible. My love is endless...even if it shows up in weird ways sometimes. You are safe with me. You are safe to hate me or love me. I am NOT leaving.So, the basic thing that is happening is that you are RE-RAISING yourself. You are saying all the things that that little scared child that has been locked up inside you has never heard. And you are going to be relentless with your love. NO MORE MESSING AROUND. Your inner child is begging for this, otherwise, we wouldn't be having this exchange on Reddit.
There are no mistakes. None. If you take the time to do this every day, you will notice the difference. It might take a bit. My inner child didn't trust me for a little while. She couldn't feel my love. Sweet little gal was pretty battered so she was very scared to open up. Now, we get along great and she knows I am here for her. WHICH is the way I don't blow up anymore or lose my temper or have anxiety attacks. Those are all gone. Those were just my inner child getting my attention in the only way she knew how. And it worked marvelously. Now, she knows I will be there for her and listen...she doesn't need to shift into bigger tactics. Or even physical ailments that are stress related.Another cool thing about this is that you will be pulling in your Higher Self insight. As you talk back and forth and gain trust with that inner ego of yours...soon they will start asking you questions. You will know when this feels right to answer. I didn't do much but love my inner child at first. Then I could feel her shift and trust me more and she would ask me questions....and I would let my higher self answer.....and talk about some inspirational stuff. Amazing stuff comes through in this vibration of love. Huge.

Aphrodite11 wrote:

I know we say we attract all this, but come  on!!!! are we supposed to say others are not accountable for their actions!!!!!!!

I personally don't believe we attract everything that happens at all....and I consider remote seduction like Lanies techniques to be something separate than the law of attraction.
I have full belief in remote seduction/influence.
I had great success with that but haven't written my success story yet as my feelings are very conflicted on what happened.....but I think it makes sense that we can communicate to people telepathically.

 

I cried suddenly today morning when i had the memory of the night he broke up with me.
I was crying and he quickly fell asleep right after breaking up with me. What a pleasure it must have been for him!!!!

I will definitely vent out someday. I will do it when the time is right.

But till then I will follow the advices you girls have given. 
I need to do this for myself. I am waiting for that day when I won't think of him even once in 24 hours, not for him but for ME.
I hope I will be fine one day. One day I just won't give a fuck!!!!

A few days after the break up I was talking to God and I just said one thing "Give me the strength to deal with all this pain I am going through" I actually asked for it. And I found it. I am glad I haven't gone utterly bonkers. Ask and you shall receive. I received.

Thank you all for guiding me!!!!

I am a queen, 
that's what I believe too. Few days before the break up, during the break up and after it, he treated me badly.
If he thinks he has the right to do that and I should take it, then he should be prepared to whatever I say to him and whatever way I treat him!!!!

If you think you have the right for whatever reasons to kick someone below the belt, be prepared to be kicked back!!!!
No matter what mental and physical condition you were in when you kicked them (except self defense).
And this sack of shit man whore had no right to do that and he definitely didn't do it in self defense.

The regret of venting out now (to show him that I am not some weak girl who takes shit and to make him realise what I did) is what is holding me back so far.
That regret is the reason why I haven't vented out yet.

Aphrodite11 wrote:

I am queen, 
I agree with you. Who the fuck do these people think they are to do anything they want to their partners and expect them to just take it?
I have done that to a friend of mine who offended me once. I was quiet for a few years and then one fine day, out of blue, I just lashed out horribly (I stood up for myself), he was utterly shocked and felt offended by that but then he stopped replying. A year later we spoke and he said that he stopped replying because he realised what a horrible thing he did and he apologised for that. He said that he thought about it, that if I was reacting with so much anger, then it must be something very bad and he found his actions horrible too.

I had a friend once who insulted women in general once by saying something very offensive about women. I was too young and I didn't say anything at that time. Then after three years I called him up and verbally abused the fuck out f him for verbally abusing women. I called him a man slut, man whore, gigolo. He apologised saying he knew he made a mistake, we stopped talking and after many months, out of blue he apologised again.

But I am unsure here. You see when I say I want to protect my reputation, I wasn't talking about impressing him, what I actually want to say is what aligemini said. I sometimes think, me lashing out right now will only convince that piece of shit that he made the right decision. Also I might regret lashing out later. That happens. We burst out but then we regret. But don't you think I should at some point some day? And yes, standing up for ourselves is one of the bravest things we can do. 

The fact that u wanna lash out shows he's done something so big to have hurt u this bad !! And another thing is when he's done something so bad still I'm sure u put up with it for a very long time until u couldn't anymore so if u can put up with that for so long he sure SHOULD PUT UP WITH YOU VENTING OUT !! 😊

I wouldn't call myself a victim. I refuse to play a victim. I do not in anyway appreciate the victim mentality.

I do agree when some of you say that we attract these things to ourselves. If we attracted the negative, we can attract the positive too. I really do understand that it's our thoughts that attract such situations. And I admit that this is the result of my thinking I had in past a few years before I met my ex. That's what made me realise that yes I attracted this situation even if I thought like that few years ago. What we think turns into reality. It may not happen immediately, it may take a few years but it does.
But are we to say that these people are in no way responsible for what happens?
If that's the case then let's set all the rapists (male as well as female) free. Let's set all the pedophiles free.
Why kill Ted Bundy? Why kill Jefery Dahmer? Why kill Aileen Wournos?
I agree that it is upto us to decide whether we give the power to someone to hurt us or not is upto us.
To be hurt or not is upto me. Sure other can hurt me but whether I want to take the hurt or not is my decision.
But are we going to say that if I stab you and you bleed, it's your fault? That if it leaves a physical and emotional scar it's your fault? Same goes for emotional attacks too.

I really want to forgive him.
I have always forgiven people in my life because I believe people deserve to be forgiven NO MATTER WHAT THEY Do, I believe not forgiving is evil and no good comes out of it.
But this time I actually want to forgive for the peace of my mind. By not forgiving and forgetting, I am hurting myself and no one else.
Okay I have this "problem". Many times I suddenly remember what someone did to me in past (even something that was done years ago) and I will suddenly get very very angry remembering those things. Trust me I do not want to remember them because I am the one who suffers after remembering them. I don't know why this happens.
My father was an alcoholic and a man whore. And mom was a loser who neglected me to please him.
My parents abused me a lot emotionally and physically. I was abused verbally and physically just for forgetting little tiny tasks (what kid doesn't forget?). They did many more horrible things to me and my brother. Fucking child abusers!!!!!!!
I really lashed out at my mom to tell her how I felt because of what they both did to me and my brother. She now realises what they did to us and regrets it.
But I still forgive her.

I admit there are occasional moments when I want there to be a day where my ex calls me, begs me, cries for me and tells me what a horrible thing he did.
But what I truly want is a day where the thought of him does not cross my mind even once. I am waiting for that day when I don't care about him and I don't think about him, not to get back at him, but for my peace of mind and happiness.