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[quote=lovelychica25][quote=SouthernFell]So I have been a long time lurker and have been using Lanie's techniques for quite some time but this is my first post as I'm feeling a little discouraged. In the fall of last year I reconnected with a friend from college and it became romantic. Things we going great up until about a month ago, we had a decent sized blow up and he said that he didn't feel he could move beyond it. We agreed to stop talking but he immediately (within a day) came back and we have been rebuilding. I began using PW on him then to make sure we got over that hump, I was doing them through last week and everything was slowly getting better we were in a good place. He went out of town last weekend with some friends, and then yesterday I felt like things were different. I asked him about it and he avoided the question but eventually told me that he met someone on the trip he felt like he was interested in so his attention was focused elsewhere. He said he wants to focus his energy only on her but did not want to risk losing me and our friendship if we stopped working towards a relationship. I said I didn't think we could go back to being just friends given everything and that we should part ways. I'm feeling really discouraged by this sudden change in behavior, I am trying to not doubt myself and the process but I'm finding that to be very difficult. Any suggestions? Is this type of thing common? In the past I have only used PW on people that I was not currently speaking to so the only change in behavior I saw was a positive one, is this par for the course? He is very very important to me for a number of reasons and I am devastated by all of this. Any reassurance or tips would be really helpful and thank you for taking the time to read.[/quote] My situation is very similar to yours, a guy I've known from college & I reconnected & things were going great and then I felt him pulling away and he finally confessed that he met a girl and wants to see where it goes with her. I had been doing PW/BWD here and there before it happened, so I was discouraged as well. Maybe he is using her to hide the feelings he's been experiencing. But like Lanie's books say to do, i just keep doing PW/BWD and continue to work on myself and believe that this too shall pass and I know it will and same goes for you as well I welcome advice as well (happy)[/quote]