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[quote=Layla][quote=Indigo][quote=Layla]  I haven't read that book! I'm not using anyone's method.. When I text him and he doesn't reply, I feel upset and feel my power is being taken away. It's not exactly "NC" I guess-- I think I should text him when I want to and really have something to say and not text just to get a response out of him. I will change his "cold" behavior with PW/BWD. Am I doing it right?? Thank you, will keep doing it!    [/quote]       I can't say if you're doing it right because you will know what works for you, but obviously you don't want to feel upset and powerless when he doesn't respond.  The concept of doing NC as I understand it is that you don't set yourself up for rejection by making contact.  You don't want to give him the impression that he's all you think about or have going on.  You keep him guessing and wondering what you're up to and not the other way around. All of that in conjunction with the meditations which you should be doing every single day for the rest of your life. Lanie covers NC in her BU2MU book, but I would suggest you read ALL of Lanie's books.  She tells you the things that you really need to know in order to gain/maintain control of your situation.  Get those right away if you can and read them.  You will be glad you did.  I promise you.  And let us know how it's going with you.        [/quote] Thank you! I bought BU2MU! I will read it tonight! In my case, we decided to be friends after the breakup. I have a tough personal issue going on now and he has promised me to always support me as a genuine friend. I think in my heart I know he will always be there for me, but I subconsciously fear he will leave. In the past few weeks, he has been blowing hot and cold. Sometimes he is a normal friend who initiates and provides me valuable support that I need. But most recently he has been ignoring my texts, even serious ones. It gives me the feeling he is treating me "less than a friend." I do not think it's what he's doing that is bothering me, but what I *think" he is doing. I would ask myself, 'is he being a jerk on purpose? Is he trying to cut me off?" But I think it's all in my head... I give him excuses that..oh he is just super busy, etc. When I do NC for a few days, I feel better, but I can't imagine doing it long run. I'm scared he'll take it as "oh good, you've moved on," ... But actually the reason I prefer to keep in touch is because I DO need his support for the issue I'm going through, only he knows about it.. What should I do? [/quote]