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[quote=Jag123]Little Update!!! So we are back in contact again and spoke for a couple of hours on the phone last night (my initiation after texting) and it was like no time had passed.  We are talking as friends  which is absolutely fine by me, because we can discuss the past without the past emotion and hurt.  Hearing his side of events, confirmed that when are in the midst of being "left" especially without explanation we make up all kinds of things in our own heads.  I realise how much I was winding myself up and causing myself unnecessary pain during that time by being so focussed on what happened, why it happened, how I could fix it, what is he thinking etc.  Looking back it was such a cruel way to treat myself and a complete waste of time. So, I think we are just feeling each other out and figuring out where we stand.  The most important thing is he has [i]changed and [/i]his approach to me has [i]changed.  [/i]I feel like he is a better version of the person I first met.  However we are at extremely early stages and it is critical that now I keep my energy and my thoughts centred.  At this point, I would normally be overthinking, texting him without thinking, telling all my friends and pussy whipping to death.  Ha ha!  Writing this is quite cathartic because I am allowing myself the luxury of thinking about him and the possibility of what could be.  I can't actually believe I have come this far, because I hadn't spoken to him in a year and he had a girlfriend.  I was a mess and certainly couldn't conceive a two hour telephone conversation which ended with "I love you". I used to fantasise about it, but I couldn't ever imagine it  [i]really [/i]happening.   For the first time, I actually feel like I can do this.  I think I can do this by taking my focus from him and keeping it on the end in mind which is a relationship.  The past has gone and it deserves no attention. As Unicorn and I were discussing, aside from living my own life to the full, I will continue to release resistance around having the committed and loving relationship that is mine but just blocked.   As an aside I highly recommend tapping.  It's quick, free and on YouTube - I genuinely believe Brad Yates is an angel.  He has hundreds of videos that are focussed on releasing your resistance.  They are life changing.  I also feel detached enough to start PW again when the mood takes.   Will keep you updated and thank you for your support!  J x[/quote]