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[quote=Avaelle]Hi Emma, Welcome to the Sisterhood!! I hope that you're enjoying Lanie's materials. It was such a fun and interesting time for me when I discovered it all! I've never lost a lover to death. But,  I have lost a lover by finding out that he had been lying to me. I will not try to compare the two losses but I will say that at least to some degree,  I know what the pain and confusion feels like. I know what it feels like to think the world has stopped and you can never be happy again because someone is gone. I'm so happy to see that you know what it feels like to become excited about someone else!  You can be happy again, you can love again.  I'm just so happy that you've been able to see this and are open to living a full life once more. I'm inspired by you overcoming MS and I hope you realize your strength! Look, don't fret over what happened with you and the POI in the past. It sounds like you have done the self work. You're at a healthier place and you have discovered tools that will help you to get you back on your mind.  I wouldn't get too deep into what to say, how often to do it. From my experience,  it crosses over into being a chore and addiction when you do that.  Come from a place of love and fun and you can only get better. Focus on living your life and being happy while knowing that your fiance would want you at your best and happy.[/quote]