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[quote=madone87][quote=Sunshine&Dreams]The self-love aspects force us to focus on us more than them. It reminds us of what's important, helps us to be in a better place. That projects outward to those who've connected with us, who're close to us, and who we're mentally connecting to. Then mentally they start thinking in a way, "I should treat her better." Or thinking of us differently (more positively). It's almost like we don't care about getting them back (we do, but the stress and fear of not having them lets up) so when they feel that lightness, they drift back like we're the lighthouse in the storm. The main goal is that when we focus on ourselves and project that love and happiness to the world, [i]everyone [/i]is guided to that light (us). [b]When we focus on us, they focus on us. When we focus on them, they focus on them.[/b] Just like giving too much to family, friends, etc. Who are we focused on? Them. Who are they focused on? Themselves. I changed my relationship with a highly abusive mother (emotionally especially) simply by changing the way it affected me and loved myself more, but didn't focus much on her and the outbursts. Is she 100% better? No, and I think it's partly me too still having work to do. But she has never treated anyone in an about-face like she has me. DRASTIC improvement. All that changed was my own self-love, focus, and when she cuts me down, telling her to stop taking her anger out on me. I speak my truth. Exact same methods we do to manifest money, our SP, etc. :) [b]When we change us, the world changes how it treats us as does the people in our world. [/b]  [/quote] Thank you for your input.  What I need to do now is just focusing on myself, so to speak? I do love myself but sometimes I got to think why this thing happened to me. I mean we used to be so good, so sweet and somehow it turns bitter down the road. I asked for a clear and honest answer but yet I didn't get any. Some of them say stop asking if he loves you because that's needy. So what should I do?  They say we can manifest anything yet I feel so many resistance. How focusing on myself will actually change the scenario and he eventually comes back by himself? :([/quote]