I remember reading in Lanie's book about someone she knows using this technique on ex husband who treated her badly.
He then wanted her back in his life. She used it for revenge. I do not seek revenge but I am curious how can you feel love and send love to someone when you are doing it for revenge? How did that even work in her case?
Revenge is negative and for her guy to want her back he must feel her love right?
In my case I find myself unable to feel, so how will that work?

But last night before doing PW I tried this https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Vv_co-zSE4I

I tried adding a little PW in this.
And I think I felt that love towards him. I was crying and smiling while doing this.
I just wanted to see him smile and happy with me. Then I did a PW.
But I ended up with a dream about him where he was aware I am there but ignoring me and being careless with his actions and I was hitting him and angry at him. 
I don't know why I saw this. I don't like dreaming about him.
And now I have decided I will mostly visualise of him and me having smiling in each other;s company and send him love as much as I can and as often as I can.

I can see where Aphrodite11 is coming from, she is trying to do things that is mention in the book, and in the PW MP3 Lanie say that 'every time you look at another woman you will only think of me',which is the same thing in a round about fashion. It still competition.

Joshbemine, that's exactly what I am trying to do.  It was in the book. That's what I wanted to know, if I can  use the name while visualising  him say what was in the book.
I just didn't know how to put it here in a question. This was the right way. You actually understood  my question.

But now that some of you have explained some things, I am also understanding what others are saying when they say I am focusing on him.
I don't see her as a problem, I see HIS FEELINGS towards her as a problem. That girl has not harmed  me in any way. She didn't offend me or do anything wrong in any way. It was my ex who did whatever he did and hurt me.

I am focusing on myself. I am starting to love myself better. I am improving myself. I want to be a better person. 
I am seeing this break up as a blessing in disguise because it has taught me how important, correct, right self love is, self love is a priority, God gave us ourselves then not loving ourselves enough is obviously wrong, offensive, disrespectful. Abandoning ourselves even a little is disrespectful.
This break up actually is teaching me that I don't NEED a particular person to be happy, that I can love someone even if they aren't in relationship with me and still be happy.

Before I learnt LOA I used to think that we can love someone even if we aren't in  relationship with them and send them that love but I used to see that we become sad when we do that and send love with sadness. I used to see a sadness in it, a longing, a pain.
But now I have learnt that we can love, send them the love and still be extremely happy.
I am working on being a better person now.
But I am having ups and downs in it. I was so happy yesterday, I visualised sending him love. He was smiling, I was smiling (I was actually smiling) but in the evening my mom ended up fighting with me horribly and I was down.

Even though I am focusing on myself, I am now understanding what all of you are saying when you say that I am still focusing on him. I have to work harder to stop focusing on him and focus only on me.

The thing is I usually need detailed explanation to understand things and I am glad you guys have done that. I can be very difficult. I am thankful and grateful that you guys made me understand and realize that I am still focusing on him in different ways even though I have started focusing on myself.
And now I will work on that.
It's actually good to learn new and different things from all of you.

pixelpie wrote:

kschmeck wrote:

This thread inspired me to think a bit about the problem if our target is with someone else and how we should deal with that in the PW sessions. I now use the words "I am free for you! And I am ready for you!" And make him say that. And right from the start this expression clicked with me. So maybe you want to try something like this? See how it feels for you...

To be most effective in visualization I find its best to visualize something that would happen after you get your goal. In  case where you want a relationship with someone . I vizualize already being in the relationship (not starting it. But what it's like to be in a active relationship with them). Think of it this way when you meet someone before knowing loa that you wanted to be in a relationship with. You  day dream about what it's like to already be  with them. It's easier to do the technique the same way because it really is the samething. One is just a way more intense way of day dream.  This way you cut out the worry of how and when etc. Doing it the other way i.e. trying to do it step by step will be putting yourself in too many road blocks. Trying to pick one way out of 100000s of how you and so in so will get back together or how (if they are with someone )they will end that or when this or that will happen etc. That's putting too much stress on the mind. That's a sure way to  drive yourself crazy. Things became a lot easier when I just vizualize whatever  it is as somthing that already happened.

 
This is a great suggestion. But how exactly do you combine this with PW. Okay maybe that's a stupid question, but hear me out... when I do PW I see HIM standing in front of me telling me he thinks about me all the time, misses me when I'm not with him, wants to be with me and only me and wants to spend the rest of his life with me... pretty much the things  lanie suggested in her books...but this sound like the start of the relationship right? So how would you do it? Do you combine pw and your visualization or do you do visuals from your marriage and in pw you make him say that he loves you etc...?

kschmeck, thank you for "I am free for you! And I am ready for you"

pixelpie, you are saying we have to think from the desire and not just of the desire to make it more effective, am I correct?

Also can someone tell me how to copy and paste other post so that you see copied posts in the beige box.