I hope that this finds you well. I too have been broken hearted.  My first love hurt me bad. I didn't think that I could go on. I wanted to share this because I know how you feel. 

Now,  I will say this.  If you are so blessed,  you have a lot of years ahead of you.   You do not want to spend the rest of them being so sad and depressed. Your ex took your happiness because you have given her the power to do so, but don't give her the power to keep it.

There could be a great and happy life awaiting you. But,  you have to be positive and healthy in order to see it.  Right now,  work on getting healthy. Focus on things that make you smile,  people that love you, your hobbies.  Get well!!!!  Then,  worry about your ex. Heck, who knows you may not even want her anymore.

Good luck!