Hattie wrote:

My husband of 7 years fell prey to a vamp of a woman who has broken more homes than I can count; the more people hear of my story, the more names drop of whose husband she slept with before. Problem is, I KNOW she is using this technique to lure the men she gets - I recognize the tricks! I don't envy the karma coming her way, but how do I save my husband from her expert clutches? He will not let her go but we are still married and he still loves me. I would NOT waste my energy on a cheater if I didn't know he is truly a good man and father to our little three year old daughter; I am NOT about to let this villain ruin my marriage. My question is; will our history and family/home life play more of a powerful role in seducing him back? Or should I focus my attention on her standing the f*ck down?!?! How a sister could do this to another womans man when she knows me, (we are neighbors - we live in a VERY small town and she is working her way down a veritable list of young, attractive UNAVAILABLE men - almost like she wants to see how far she can take it). He is in danger with this tramp! I'm at my wits end. The sexual energy is still strong between us, it's the confused emotional tug-of-war that he is feeling. What do I do? 

Hattie the love you have between you and the child is a very strong emotional pull that is hard to break but you must do everything you can.  You know him well and you will know whether an ultimatum will work or not.  A lot of men will rebel if they are given one but he can't be allowed to continue to have you both.

I have an acquaintance whose husband had an affair and she threw him out.  He ended up marrying the other woman and they have been together 20 years.  Backfired.  A friend of mine had the same thing happen.  Both men said they were in love with their wife AND the other woman.  Since the wife made the decision to let them go they were off the hook for the decision.  Only you know whether you are ready to risk losing them but it will hard on you and your self-esteem to hold on.

Do the technique and visualize him being MADLY in love with you like in the beginning of the relationship.  Send him love and feel him sending it back to you.  Tell him "you will think of me when you are with her" or hear him say "I'm sorry and I will never leave or hurt you".  xoxoxoxoxo

Ok, being realistic here for a minute. If its true that she's had a long list of other people's husbands, what makes you think she's going to stop with yours? While I wouldn't wish her onto someone else's marriage, the chances are, if this has been her M.O. she'll lose interest and move on to the next guy. She doesn't sound like the type that wants to take your husband and settle down with him. So in a way, the fact that she's goes through a lot of them quickly is kind of good news. Call your husband back to you and seduce him with the method. 

Lanie Stevens wrote:

Hattie wrote:

My husband of 7 years fell prey to a vamp of a woman who has broken more homes than I can count; the more people hear of my story, the more names drop of whose husband she slept with before. Problem is, I KNOW she is using this technique to lure the men she gets - I recognize the tricks! I don't envy the karma coming her way, but how do I save my husband from her expert clutches? He will not let her go but we are still married and he still loves me. I would NOT waste my energy on a cheater if I didn't know he is truly a good man and father to our little three year old daughter; I am NOT about to let this villain ruin my marriage. My question is; will our history and family/home life play more of a powerful role in seducing him back? Or should I focus my attention on her standing the f*ck down?!?! How a sister could do this to another womans man when she knows me, (we are neighbors - we live in a VERY small town and she is working her way down a veritable list of young, attractive UNAVAILABLE men - almost like she wants to see how far she can take it). He is in danger with this tramp! I'm at my wits end. The sexual energy is still strong between us, it's the confused emotional tug-of-war that he is feeling. What do I do? 

Hattie the love you have between you and the child is a very strong emotional pull that is hard to break but you must do everything you can.  You know him well and you will know whether an ultimatum will work or not.  A lot of men will rebel if they are given one but he can't be allowed to continue to have you both.

I have an acquaintance whose husband had an affair and she threw him out.  He ended up marrying the other woman and they have been together 20 years.  Backfired.  A friend of mine had the same thing happen.  Both men said they were in love with their wife AND the other woman.  Since the wife made the decision to let them go they were off the hook for the decision.  Only you know whether you are ready to risk losing them but it will hard on you and your self-esteem to hold on.

Do the technique and visualize him being MADLY in love with you like in the beginning of the relationship.  Send him love and feel him sending it back to you.  Tell him "you will think of me when you are with her" or hear him say "I'm sorry and I will never leave or hurt you".  xoxoxoxoxo

This is what I needed to hear xoxo Thank you so much. I refuse to give up on seven years over a 3 month glitch in his Matrix! I know I can win him back and now I have the tools to do it effectively, without feeling like a sucker OR a door mat. I'll keep you posted. <3 

I replied to DC last night but  I don't see the post; basically I just said that I really have no concrete way to know if the other woman is using PW strategies, just that she is so homely and unkempt and genuinely horrid. She has an obnoxious personality, no one can stand to be around her, she is always a slob and yet she manages to snare married and/or otherwise committed men all the time. There must be something. She is no where near my husbands type, but - I am very appreciative of the link for more techniques and tips. I am not letting this temporary insanity unravel my entire marriage. Thanks ladies for listening xoxo Hope to provide wonderful updates on my success! 

Hattie wrote:

just that she is so homely and unkempt and genuinely horrid. She has an obnoxious personality, no one can stand to be around her, she is always a slob and yet she manages to snare married and/or otherwise committed men all the time. There must be something.

Hattie - so sorry this has been happening to you. I know how frustrating it is to have someone like that seduce and hold your husband's attention especially when she sounds so cheap and low class. 

Your description of her reminded me of an article I saved years ago (to review when I get married) and I think it might give you some insight into why all these men are cheating with her:
http://relationship-coach.org/Attractiveness/what-is-attractive-to-others.html

I highlighted this paragraph:
"The women who are your competition are the one's who make your husband feel important, interesting, capable, and attractive. The admiring secretary has a much better chance of having an affair with your husband than the young beauty who lives next door--even if she is ten years older than you! To keep your husband attracted to you, you need to make your husband feel young (even if he's 60), attractive, important, and interesting. Don't do it because you fear losing him (that would be needy), but do it because you love him and because that's part of what it really means to be married."

It's not very likely that this woman is doing these visualization techniques; she probably doesn't need them. Manipulators have their own way of getting what they want, and she's either making these guys feel like kings or doing the opposite - being an absolute demanding bitch (many guys respond to this). 

Whatever it is - you CAN turn this around. Step back and ask yourself how do you want things to BE? (This question has helped me a lot when things were spiraling downhill.) 

We're all cheering and rooting for you... please update us on how things are progressing! Wish you LOTS OF success! Your husband ain't going anywhere, he's yours and ONLY yours.