I have found a well written post which explains how to use LOA to attract the version of the person and love that you want. Many of us spend much of the time observing the actions of the person which we don't want and not placing focus on the desires we want.

Have a read.

I've been having some thoughts and insights about using the law of attraction, conciously, in relationships. I would like to share them here and invite additional contribution.

One of the things I have seen asked - and I have asked myself - when using LOA in relationships is 'how is it possible to MAKE someone else feel a certain way?'. We ask this when we're using LOA to attract romantic relationship, better friendship or harmony with our family or at work. After all, we're told that a fundamental of LOA is that 'I can only create in MY reality', right? We're told that we are only responsible for ourself - not anyone else. And someone else can create whatever THEY want.

Many people, myself included, have then asked - if this is the case, how can I influence someone to treat me differently, how can I get an ex who is adamant that 'it's over' to come back to me, how can I have my Mum / Dad / boss treat me more nicely?

From watching LOA videos, reading and using my intuition I now have an answer that is much closer into the vortex and the truth. This is how: everyone has every possibility in them. Read that again. Each person is a multitude of possibilities, only a small fraction of which are expressed at any one time. By this, I'm talking about vibrational possibilities. Remember, we are fundamentally vibrational beings - so we can vibrate at many, many different frequencies. I can vibrate at the frequency of love, in the vortex, using LOA effortlessley. I can vibrate at the frequency of hope, verging on belief. I can vibrate at frustration. I can vibrate at wealth...poverty...hatred...depression...emptiness...excitement...creativity - and so on. We - each one of us - is full of an entire range of vibrational frequencies. When we begin conciously using LOA, we are choosing our frequency.

Now, when we use LOA with other people - we are not (as I used to think) 'making' them do or think or feel anything. What we are doing - is activating a dormant vibration within them. Think of it this way - each person contains a million, billion vibrational seeds. You pick the one you want, and water it with your constant attention to it. That is the seed which grows. There is a big difference between thinking this way - I am just activating something within them that's already there - to thinking 'I have to MAKE them love me' or 'I have to MAKE them want to come back to me'.

When we realise that what we want is already in that other person, the process of attracting becomes much, much easier. Because we KNOW that possibility already exists, in potentia. And KNOWING is right up the top of the vibrational scale - higher than HOPE. We can HOPE that the person loves us (for example). Or we can KNOW that they ALREADY love us, respect us, treat us well - and that this just needs to be activated.

There's something more, too. You know however 'they' are acting at the moment? Whether it's your ex who cut off all contact, your flatmate who is always stealing your toast or your boss who is just mean? This part is important. How they are acting now was once just a seed and 'this' current reality is no more important and certainly no more powerful than the 'seed' reality you are going to help to grow.

Read that again.

Current 'reality' is no more powerful than the seed reality.

ALL CURRENT REALITY SHOWS YOU IS WHERE YOUR VIBRATIONAL FREQUENCY *WAS*.

I say 'was', because, as The Secret says - one of my favourite quotes: 'That's not who you ARE - that's who you...WERE!'. So wherever, however someone is treating you is just showing you which vibrational seed you have activated within them, and it will always correlate with your PAST vibrational reality.

And as soon as you change your focus, and shift your vibrational reality...BOOM! You'll activate a new seed! So the most powerful potential within a person is not the currently activated one. It's the one you choose to give your attention to NOW. Most people don't realise this, so they just keep giving their attention to the currently activated seed, thinking 'that's all there is', 'that's who THEY are' or 'that's just how they behave'. And so that seed stays active. For a seed to stay active, it NEEDS attention. Give your attention to a different seed - and a different reality will BLOOM!
http://www.powerlawofattraction.com/forum/index.php?topic=7978.0