Em wrote:

ThisIsMyUsername wrote:

Thank you! So what would I do on this emergency visit with my therapist? I can't talk about my ex. He'll just try to tell me I need to move on... 

A good therapist will target your insecurities, doubts and fears head on and help you find ways to live for YOU. They will help you find closure on your old relationship with her so you can finally start attracting a better, brand new one with her. If your therapist is telling you nothing but to "move on" then I highly suggest you seek out a better one. DO NOT mention that you want or intend on getting this girl back though. You need to find closure and accept that your old relationship with her is GONE first before you can move onto better things with her.

Thing is, I dont know whats blocking things. I feel not only an extreme and utterly complete disconnect fron her, but also from reality. I just cant accept the way things are between she and I. I cant accept this. Ive tried. I just want a complete shift. I feel like im going mad

I feel like I'm going completely insane, trying to bring her back. Like legitimately insane. I feel like I'm losing my sanity trying to bring her back. And I don't know how to stop losing it. I can't explain it well, but it's such a feeling of horror and death. Ugh.

And no matter how hard I try, I can't convince myself this is working. I can't convince myself that there's even the slightest bit of hope for her coming back into my life. And worse, it couples with the fact that she may be talking to another guy and I cannot convince myself that this is working!!! I've been trying SO DAMN HARD. I just can't, and I HONESTLY do not know how to. I feel so hopeless. I feel so unmotivated to even live since things ended. I can't believe how much she's affected my life.

Last edited by ThisIsMyUsername (9/21/2016 5:36 am)

This woman is NOT your life. A horrible thought but what would happen if she died tomorrow? You would still wake up every day and have to plow through. Things would get easier over time, and you would still live. And you WILL. You cannot let this girl make you feel like this. You need to stop focusing on bringing her back for a good while. Because you can pick this back up any time you like. Even if it was 10 years from now you can still pick this back up. As soon as you feel better and have yourself centred. Look at what this is doing to you!

Your health and wellbeing is more important than any girl ever will be. She is NOT the bane of your life, nobody ever will be. YOU are. It goes without saying that nobody will ever love you unless you love yourself first. And that means loving yourself enough to not allow anybody to make you feel like this, too. I know that's hard to believe right now but you need to accept for a moment that your relationship with her for the time being is gone. Trust me. Accepting this is a huge step in recovery and it will be A HUGE RELIEF for you. I did this recently and I feel fantastic. Your therapist should talk about what YOU want to talk about and whatever it is that is affecting you the most and if he/she is failing to do that then they are very clearly not cut out for the job.

You deserve so much better than this, man. You really do. Give yourself a break, I've driven myself crazy in the past over an ex, literally crazy to the point I was begging to be taken into hospital so I didn't end up harming myself (this was a long time ago now) and taking a break from all of this attracting them back crap did me absolute wonders. You literally can come back to it at any time. I promise!

Last edited by Em (9/21/2016 6:09 am)

ThisIsMyUsername wrote:

I don't know hwo to break this trend. Yes. I love her. Yes I want her back NOW. But waht I really need and want RIGHT NOW is to stop feeling this way. It's killing me and I can't take it. I want there to be SOMETHIGN I can do to attract her back RIGHT NOW! Because I'm driving myself insane, and I honestly can't step away from trying to convince myself whether this shit is true or not. I'm a smart guy. I've thoguht that maybe that'd be a good diea. I can't. I can't stop questioning this. I want her back right now. I do love myself, but I want this sense of hopelessness to end NOW. It's KILLING me. I can't describe the hell I'm feeling. It's literally deriivng me mad.

Get a book from audiobook and listen the power of now by Eckhart Tole
This help me in my most darkest time of my life.
I was there where you are right now, anf now I am totally new and to get where I an today it took time.
And my final to feel good was Lanie thecnique

Focus in heal your self and don't fight the feeling

Last edited by Linda (9/21/2016 6:28 am)

There isn't any short cut I am afraid.

Stop the feel as a victim.
We are not a victim

We are powerful beyond measure let's us remember that.

Each our journey it's different and it take time for each of us but we have to find away. By practicing everything we get a hold on.
This is the way we find out what works for us.

Your relatioship it's dead, my relationship with my ex it's dead too.
It took time for me to accept and finally only a month I have move on.
I mean I move on from the old relqtiship and this took me a year

This place it's great place to stay and you luck guy to have found it this website and LOA

You need to change little by little
If you don't like to read buy some books on audiblebook and practice what you learn.
And use Lanie thecnique and take your time out.

If I were you I would disappear complete of her face for months year depend how ready I would be to see her face again
If you are rushing then you are not ready.

For me my ex will never hear from me again. Only spiritually lol
It took time to be where I am right now remember that xx

Last edited by Linda (9/21/2016 6:39 am)