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Aphrodite11 wrote:
Yes he is married. But wasn't I there first? Weren't the promises made to me broken? Wasn't the commitment made to me broken? Wasn't I hurt? Wasn't I betrayed? Backstabbed ? Didn't he just bounce to someone else in no time? Perhaps even before leaving me? How is all this fair then?
How do such people don't go through the consequencesof their actions?
What promises did he make to you? Did he ask you to marry him? Did he give you an engagement ring? Did he introduce you to his family and friends as his future wife? You do understand that some men will say anything in order to have their way with us, right. I hate to point these things out to you but you need to be realistic.
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Indigo wrote:
Aphrodite11 wrote:
Yes he is married. But wasn't I there first? Weren't the promises made to me broken? Wasn't the commitment made to me broken? Wasn't I hurt? Wasn't I betrayed? Backstabbed ? Didn't he just bounce to someone else in no time? Perhaps even before leaving me? How is all this fair then?
How do such people don't go through the consequencesof their actions?What promises did he make to you? Did he ask you to marry him? Did he give you an engagement ring? Did he introduce you to his family and friends as his future wife? You do understand that some men will say anything in order to have their way with us, right. I hate to point these things out to you but you need to be realistic.
Exactly this. Actions always speak louder than words, especially with men. Men need to prove with their actions that they are genuine, their word means nothing and we as women need to make a more conscious effort to realize that. That's why Lanie mentions it so much and why she encourages NC.
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How is it even a marriage when he was thinking of me even after being with her ? At least that's what his best friend said. Or at least let's assume he was thinking of me because I have heard people don't just stop thinking about their exes even if they are with a new person. Then is that not an emotional unavailability already to their partners? A form of betrayal to them already? Something we didn't do with the techniques?
And how is it even a marriage when it's done just to please pimping mommy and daddy to become a dowry loving man whore ?
When I decided to go no contact, I didn't use my WhatsApp for nearly 25 days. The day I installed it again and came online he texted me "Good (with a smile face)". If you are so happy with new person and not thinking of me then why keep checking if I have come back online or not?
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Hi sweetie! I'm so sorry about what happened!
Stop the self-bashing right now. No matter how bad you feel inside, work on forgiving yourself and healing. Please make that a priority.
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Indigo wrote:
Aphrodite11 wrote:
Yes he is married. But wasn't I there first? Weren't the promises made to me broken? Wasn't the commitment made to me broken? Wasn't I hurt? Wasn't I betrayed? Backstabbed ? Didn't he just bounce to someone else in no time? Perhaps even before leaving me? How is all this fair then?
How do such people don't go through the consequencesof their actions?What promises did he make to you? Did he ask you to marry him? Did he give you an engagement ring? Did he introduce you to his family and friends as his future wife? You do understand that some men will say anything in order to have their way with us, right. I hate to point these things out to you but you need to be realistic.
If you read my story you will notice that yes he asked me to get married, he wanted kids with me, he was talking about all this up until few days before the break up. He told his friends we were in a relationship and introduced me to his best friend of 8 years and she became very fond of me. I forgot to mention that he is from a Hindu family and I am from a mixed family. He was pointing this before the break up. He mentioned his parents might not like it.
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I'm sorry you are hurting right now.
Allow yourself a short period to rant and rave about it. Then vow to move on.
He is married now. There is no need to sit there anyalsis what he did or didn't say. From where you stand he is married and you are upset. So now your focus needs to be on how are you going to heal? How are you going to release all the old baggage and just accept all that is and has been?
Once you are healed then you will have the clarity to get back to attracting the relationship you desire n
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Oasiscalm wrote:
I'm sorry you are hurting right now.
Allow yourself a short period to rant and rave about it. Then vow to move on.
He is married now. There is no need to sit there anyalsis what he did or didn't say. From where you stand he is married and you are upset. So now your focus needs to be on how are you going to heal? How are you going to release all the old baggage and just accept all that is and has been?
Once you are healed then you will have the clarity to get back to attracting the relationship you desire n
Attract a relationship with whom ?
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Aphrodite11 wrote:
Oasiscalm wrote:
I'm sorry you are hurting right now.
Allow yourself a short period to rant and rave about it. Then vow to move on.
He is married now. There is no need to sit there anyalsis what he did or didn't say. From where you stand he is married and you are upset. So now your focus needs to be on how are you going to heal? How are you going to release all the old baggage and just accept all that is and has been?
Once you are healed then you will have the clarity to get back to attracting the relationship you desire nAttract a relationship with whom ?
Whoever you like
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I can't remember where I read this but it was perhaps here on the forum about some man who wanted a specific woman, he used to visualise about her, but she married someone else, he continued his efforts, dated other women and after five years the woman got divorced and was with this fellow.
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Oasiscalm wrote:
Aphrodite11 wrote:
Oasiscalm wrote:
I'm sorry you are hurting right now.
Allow yourself a short period to rant and rave about it. Then vow to move on.
He is married now. There is no need to sit there anyalsis what he did or didn't say. From where you stand he is married and you are upset. So now your focus needs to be on how are you going to heal? How are you going to release all the old baggage and just accept all that is and has been?
Once you are healed then you will have the clarity to get back to attracting the relationship you desire nAttract a relationship with whom ?
Whoever you like
Including him I assume