Forget LOA for a minute and just focus on advice that would be given in this situation normally.

He's not giving you what you want, that's causing you pain, the situation doesn't look like it's going to change right now anyway so in this situation you should cut contact and move on with your life. I would tell him you want to get over him and not to contact you.

If you are currently using any techniques on him then I would stop or at least cut down on them drastically as people often say that these techniques make them feel more strongly about the person.

If you feel you need to use some PW on him then stick to a couple of minutes and then picture him and use the Ho'oponono prayer in your head, google that if you are not familiar with it, it is very calming.

I would also try cutting the cord with him and see how you feel.

Try no contact, cutting the cord and Ho'oponono for a week or 2 and see how you feel, missing a week of PW is not going to make a difference if you've kept up these techniques all this time.

 

marilyng wrote:

Forget LOA for a minute and just focus on advice that would be given in this situation normally.

He's not giving you what you want, that's causing you pain, the situation doesn't look like it's going to change right now anyway so in this situation you should cut contact and move on with your life. I would tell him you want to get over him and not to contact you.

If you are currently using any techniques on him then I would stop or at least cut down on them drastically as people often say that these techniques make them feel more strongly about the person.

If you feel you need to use some PW on him then stick to a couple of minutes and then picture him and use the Ho'oponono prayer in your head, google that if you are not familiar with it, it is very calming.

I would also try cutting the cord with him and see how you feel.

Try no contact, cutting the cord and Ho'oponono for a week or 2 and see how you feel, missing a week of PW is not going to make a difference if you've kept up these techniques all this time.

 

​I agree with you and I'm sure I would give this advice to someone else in my situation just find it hard to implement in my own life! I love this man and I held onto him for too long afraid of loosing him completely but that is just not living and that is not what I deserve. I need to get to a place where I believe its better for me to be on my own then living a half life with someone who can't commit to me.. Ho'oponono​ has worked for me in the past, I need to try it again.
​
Thank you sisters for your support xoxo
 

jellyb wrote:

I'm so sorry for what you're going through, Blissful. I know how painful it is, I think we all do. You deserve so much awesomeness, and I agree with what the other wonderful ladies here have said. And don't kick yourself for what's happened up to now. You did what you felt you needed to.

Cutting the cord will help you, as will Ho'oponono. And you can still do PW on him later when you feel stronger and more able. Your absence will surely be felt by him no matter what's happening with him with a job or anything else. Better for him to come back when you're in a place of power.

Big hugs, sister.

​Thank you Jellyb,
​you are so right and I do believe this will really affect him not being able to see me whenever he wants! I just need to focus on myself and not rely on him for my happiness. The methods are so simple but not easy! such a mental struggle to get to where you want to be from your current reality but I know I can, just need to take it day by day and focus on other areas of my life. I hope you are well and good things are happening for you!
xoxo
 

I want o say this.
Do not sleep with an ex after the break up if you have feelings for him/her.

I had a friend who was dumped by his girlfriend for another man. Many months later she contacted him and then slept with him while still being in a relationship with this another man. He slept with her thinking she still wanted him and loved him and she might comeback if he pleases her. He wanted to marry her. 
When he told her he wanted to marry her and still loved her she said "I can't betray my boyfriend".
He was heartbroken and shattered. This girl didn't give a fuck about his feelings. She contacted him again after all this (for the same reason of course) and he told her to just leave him alone.

She is not the only girl I have seen doing this.
This is why I don't generalise. Women do this too but are more discreet about things (because of society). And usually men don't even find out or realise they have been used.

So boys and girls, if you people still have feelings for your ex and want to have a serious relationship with them again, DO NOT SLEEP WITH THEM. Not even after you start the relationship again. Take things slow. build something first.

I don't care what gender you belong to. This is unhealthy for anyone. 
Take care everyone.

Blissful wrote:

Hi Sisters,
​I have been MIA for a long time from the forum dealing with personal issues and just generally trying to raise my vibration and stay on a positive self love journey.. now I am dealing with recent heartbreak from my love again and want to turn to my sisters for support and encouragement that I chose the right path.
​6 months ago my love came back and we fell into a friends with benefits situation, Lanie advised me to stop this immediately and I wish I had taken her advice, I knew deep down I was giving up my power to him by seeing him this way but I just couldn't let him go. He has been applying for work overseas in the USA and Canada (we live in Australia) so he always said to me he can't commit to anything as any moment he could be leaving the country. I persisted because I though I could do the technique and change his mind and bring him back to me. I received conflicting advice on other forums saying I should be grateful he still wants to see me and be intimate with me and that its a positive sign and just keep doing the techniques and he will be offering a committed relationship in no time. So I continued seeing him on a weekly basis but it just never progressed into the relationship I desired. I finally told him I can't keep hanging out like this and that I want to progress into a loving relationship, he of course responded with the usual response with "I am still applying for work overseas so I just cant commit to anything right now because if I leave we will have to go through the whole shit process again, I understand you can't wait anymore and you and you should be with someone who can give you what you want" I know he loves me and cares about me but it fucking hurts that I'm not enough to fight for.. he's letting me go based around an imaginary job that probably wont even happen but he'd rather focus on a 'what if' job then try again with me. I'm just so devastated I've spent all this time trying to get us back together and he still just keeps me at arms length but is so affectionate and loving when we are around each other.. I just don't get it. I know I need to walk away but its still so hard for me to let him go when he is so available but only on a physical level and I know that's not enough and I deserve so much more. Some advice would be so helpful, I contacted Lanie and she was so supportive and kind, told me to be strong and I am trying to be.. It's like I just can't take my own advice and I am so worried me walking away from him is going to result in loosing him forever.. I believe in LOA and trust in the process but I just find my situation so confusing and I'm just in a really low place right now.
​Big love to you all xoxo

Sorry you are having a hard time.

My advice to you and I truly hope you take it is to take some time out and work on yourself. He isn't going anyway. Trust me if he is what you desire you can have it. But you absolutely have to put yourself and your heart first.

Get your confidence back sky high. Spend time affirming how fab you are. Fill yourself up with love and confidence. Glow with a resolve that all that  will be flowing to you will be full of commitment and love. Once you are strong and full of resolve then decide whether he is the one and whether you will continue to concentrate on him. If it's him then you lock your laser on him and get to work.

But trust me you have the opportunity to build a foundation here and the foundation starts with you. What he says means nothing. All it does is show you what you are vibrating. He is reflecting to you your doubts fears and worries. Clear them up first and foremost then act.