Sunshine&Dreams wrote:

The self-love aspects force us to focus on us more than them. It reminds us of what's important, helps us to be in a better place. That projects outward to those who've connected with us, who're close to us, and who we're mentally connecting to. Then mentally they start thinking in a way, "I should treat her better." Or thinking of us differently (more positively). It's almost like we don't care about getting them back (we do, but the stress and fear of not having them lets up) so when they feel that lightness, they drift back like we're the lighthouse in the storm. The main goal is that when we focus on ourselves and project that love and happiness to the world, everyone is guided to that light (us).

When we focus on us, they focus on us. When we focus on them, they focus on them. Just like giving too much to family, friends, etc. Who are we focused on? Them. Who are they focused on? Themselves. I changed my relationship with a highly abusive mother (emotionally especially) simply by changing the way it affected me and loved myself more, but didn't focus much on her and the outbursts. Is she 100% better? No, and I think it's partly me too still having work to do. But she has never treated anyone in an about-face like she has me. DRASTIC improvement. All that changed was my own self-love, focus, and when she cuts me down, telling her to stop taking her anger out on me. I speak my truth. Exact same methods we do to manifest money, our SP, etc. When we change us, the world changes how it treats us as does the people in our world.
 

Thank you for your input.  What I need to do now is just focusing on myself, so to speak? I do love myself but sometimes I got to think why this thing happened to me. I mean we used to be so good, so sweet and somehow it turns bitter down the road. I asked for a clear and honest answer but yet I didn't get any. Some of them say stop asking if he loves you because that's needy. So what should I do? 

They say we can manifest anything yet I feel so many resistance. How focusing on myself will actually change the scenario and he eventually comes back by himself?

Piper wrote:

madone87 wrote:

Hi stardust

Your story gives me hope. Hopefully I'm able to manifest ij such a way. Me and my man arent in good terms now and many of them suggested me to move on. But I think we shouldnt give up that easily right? 😊

People like to state their opinion and their limiting beliefs and that is why i never share any work i am doing with anyone who is not of the same mindset as me.

If it is a true desire, continue doing what you're doing. If, however, it is an ego baded want, you will tire of it and eventually give up. This is my experience and others i know.

My belief is there is no one outside if you - everything comes from within and we are the cause if everything in our lives, including the bad shit. If we went through a break up, it's our fault because of our beliefs we held about that person/situation. So, to get someone back you much first take responsibility that you caused it and then go within and do the work from there. Some like to focus on self love, and that's important, but you also need to change your perspective and beliefs about that person.

Just my 2 cents.

Thank you Piper for taking the time to give your input. 

Yes, I have learned my lesson that I won't simply share anything about my thing to anybody including my closest friends. 
I do get tired honestly but certainly not coming from ego. This is my heartiest desire ever though he asked me if I'm still hoping on him and gone distant. I want to ask him so badly but I don't want to seem as clingy and needy and make things worse.
So what would be your suggestion then? Just put aside and solely focus on myself for the time being? And believe he comes back and he is indeed coming back? 

Piper wrote:

madone87 wrote:

Piper wrote:

People like to state their opinion and their limiting beliefs and that is why i never share any work i am doing with anyone who is not of the same mindset as me.

If it is a true desire, continue doing what you're doing. If, however, it is an ego baded want, you will tire of it and eventually give up. This is my experience and others i know.

My belief is there is no one outside if you - everything comes from within and we are the cause if everything in our lives, including the bad shit. If we went through a break up, it's our fault because of our beliefs we held about that person/situation. So, to get someone back you much first take responsibility that you caused it and then go within and do the work from there. Some like to focus on self love, and that's important, but you also need to change your perspective and beliefs about that person.

Just my 2 cents.

Thank you Piper for taking the time to give your input. 

Yes, I have learned my lesson that I won't simply share anything about my thing to anybody including my closest friends. 
I do get tired honestly but certainly not coming from ego. This is my heartiest desire ever though he asked me if I'm still hoping on him and gone distant. I want to ask him so badly but I don't want to seem as clingy and needy and make things worse.
So what would be your suggestion then? Just put aside and solely focus on myself for the time being? And believe he comes back and he is indeed coming back? 

He is YOU, and you are him. Everything/everyone is just a projection of your inner self - it's an illusion. You cannot change anything on the outside until you first change you. Focus on changing your beliefs of him and don't think of him as being separate from you - he is you. Read LOTS of Neville and you will understand. I don't practice any techniques except Neville techniques and pw, since it is Nev based. You should work on self love if you think that's important. I also don't believe the "this or something better" stuff. A desire is a gift, and it must be so.

So from now onwards, I need to change my perception about him and work strongly on myself first? Today i reached out for him after 2 days, he replied he was so busy and yada yada yada (well he used to spend some time thou he was so damn bz back then).

Yes i do read Neville's too. But too many of it, hardly grasp. Me either. i dont believe on someone better cuz since we are conscious creator, we can manifest something better in that person.
 

Sunshine&Dreams wrote:

madone87 wrote:

Thank you for your input.  What I need to do now is just focusing on myself, so to speak? I do love myself but sometimes I got to think why this thing happened to me. I mean we used to be so good, so sweet and somehow it turns bitter down the road. I asked for a clear and honest answer but yet I didn't get any. Some of them say stop asking if he loves you because that's needy. So what should I do? 

They say we can manifest anything yet I feel so many resistance. How focusing on myself will actually change the scenario and he eventually comes back by himself?

See, that's where that resistance comes in. I say this from dealing with it myself so I hold no judgment or anything. We can say we love ourselves, and maybe we do for one moment or one instance, but as I've noticed about myself, then I start going down that same resistance path. Which is me putting labels into actions of another, or thinking why did they do this, that, etc. Yet that is showing us where we need work. Take my one issue is not focusing my time better. So then my person doesn't prioritize me, and I see it as not being important to him. But it's because I am the one not focusing on me. That's me pushed out (where that idea comes in). Whatever he does to you, there is something in your life, which you're not doing for yourself, and where that self-love comes in. If they aren't prioritizing you then ask where you're not prioritizing yourself. If they are saying they're busy, then where are you not managing your time better? If they aren't focusing on you, where aren't you focusing on yourself? That's why we gotta work on ourselves.

Yes, focus on yourself, first. You even said it. You reached out, he said he was busy. You're still focused on him, so he's still focused on him, hence the resistance. That resistance you feel tells you that yes, working on yourself right now is what you should be doing. Don't take this advice if it doesn't feel right (always listen to your intuition inside most of all on how to do things), but I'd advise not reaching out and allowing him to come to you. Otherwise you're going to continue to get that resistance. NOT reaching out is the hardest thing to do, but it gets easier in time.

I also agree with Piper's thoughts.
 

Whoa I got to see this reply after half year, lol. I haven't been on this forum for so long. Thank you again for your inputs. Well, I have given up in manifesting that guy. Nothing happened despite techniques. Now I am focusing on manifesting my ex back (i called him my love). May this year will be the year of mine getting married with him.