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5/20/2023 7:29 pm  #1


He called but not like I imagined...whats next?

Hey everyone new to the forum but have lurked for a while, I'll try to keep this short as possible though.

I think I mostly need some encouragement. I've been on this journey for months now when I first learned about LOA and Neville then came across Lanies methods and got her books. It seems like I've hardly had any movement with my POI (only small things after BWD) and I would say I've spent the last couple of months trying to get over it and not be desperate or hurt anymore.

I am now in a much better state than when I started and I have begun to care less and less however yesterday I saw my POI with his "gf" (were all in the same program so I see them more than I would like) and went up to them in person and made them both talk to me individually because I felt I was owed more respect and wanted them to actually understand how hurt I was. Me and my POI have a history and I went through a lot because of him and he treated me so poorly. (I am trying not to feel embarrassed by approaching them like that but my guy friend said it was honorable and brave of me to demand more, thoughts on this?)

At first he wasn't super receptive and was kind of defensive but I tried to keep my emotions in check. I told him what I wanted was an apology. Later he called me and was willing to come meet me and answer any questions I had (shocking). This talk went well and I tried to be kind to him (kill him with kindness, right?) but also maintain my boundaries. He said I could text him sometimes and he would see about inviting me to hang out with our mutual friends (who were initially his friends so I backed away from that group). Though I will say he was acting kind of weird about me perhaps doing something to him or his gf because in his words "people are crazy" (?)

I don't really know what I want anymore, I'm not threatened by the 3p at all and I hardly think about her (took me a minute to get here). She's truly nothing special and while she is sweet she is not half the woman that I am. She's not what POI needs as she won't push him to be better and same for her. There's also something strange about them together.  it would be easier if the 3p was gone. Despite me ignoring her and trying different meditations, and truly believing that they don't have a good connection she's somehow still in the picture which is so surprising to me every time I see it. Granted sometimes I see them together and it doesn't look like its going well but they both said it was (of course). I noticed they don't hold hands anymore and she started trailing behind anytime they walk together.

I couldn't understand why my POI was so awful to me. While we were having our talk he stated how I had been through a lot and I am a good person. It hit me this morning, and this is just speculation so I'm not even sure that it makes sense, that he has such low self esteem that he probably didn't feel like he was good enough for me. This is the 3p first relationship and it seems like he can control her more and as he told me their relationship was a "crutch" in his healing, though he seems better I don't believe he's truly healed.

The questions:
At first I wanted some sort of revenge, is that bad? How do I actually get the power back in the scenario?

Can I PW my POI to have him respect me more? Is it worth it? How would I even go about it?

Like I said I'm moving on, I do feel like we could've had something great but despite EIYPO and changing my state and beliefs about myself and him, I can't keep doing this. I have more self worth now and I'm more indifferent. What happens to all the effort and energy I put into manifesting him back?

I understand that our thoughts create or whatever but I've always felt that my POI had really strong feelings for me, like I would've died on that belief so why did he show up so different these past months?

Overall I don't know how to proceed forward but I do know I deserve good things to happen for me irrespective of my POI. He left me in a really bad state and while I've gotten myself to a place thats much better I know I am deserving of even more. I have tried EFT tapping, meditating, affirmations and scripting (which I all still do just whenever I feel like it) but how can I truly change my life? Can I use PW/BWD to attract someone new/general?

and truly what's the deal with the 3p?

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