It has been nearly 3 months since the break up and while I have been able to manifest him back on several occasions, he is very persistent in not having a relationship because he wants to keep his options open. He does tell me that he loves me and wants me but he doesn't want all the responsibility that comes along with having a relationship and just wants to be selfish. I have tried positive affirmations, going to therapy, scripting, journaling, meditation, yoga, LOA, PW, and even RS, but I am still hitting a block with him. I have tried to remain positive throughout it all but there are times where I just feel completely helpless and that all my work is in vain. That is why I made a comment about Free Will, because at the end of the day, he is still choosing to be the way that he is and do what he is doing, regardless of my efforts. 

dreamb wrote:

I don't focus too much on free will, I think when you want something and try to feel good about it without fear or negativity, things align and make it happen. I've broken up with someone convinced at the moment that I wanted nothing to do with them and a few months later missed them like crazy and realized I loved them. It's been done to me as well. The longer you focus on his current way of thinking (that he doesn't want to be with you), the longer it'll be your reality. There's a reason so many people regret losing someone once the other person backs off and moves on.

Okay, so I know that we went back and forth yesterday as I was getting my situation out in the forum for advice. So last night, I was feeling really negative so I decided to drive to the gym and try and work out my frustrations. As I had previously mentioned, I had went into NC and hadn't heard from him, until I was done with the gym last night and was heading home. I was feeling in such a great mood and super happy until I got a plethora of mean, nasty, and down right cruel text messages from him. Everything from name calling to mocking me having a mental illness (PTSD), saying that I had a "damaged mind" and such. I was blown away by everything. Hours before I had gone to the gym, I had read on a post here to detach and to even do a cord cutting meditation, which I ended up doing and then boom, last night happened. I am definitely backing away for the time being. 

dreamb wrote:

I understand how discouraging it can get but if you strongly believe the negative thoughts, things aren't going to change. It sounds like deep down, you are convinced that things are the way they are for good. If you do PW but your mind is thinking things won't work or change then you are resisting and prolonging results. Just focus on the outcome and let things fall into place, time will pass anyway so you might as well try believing in the good and see where that gets you. Try 2 or 3 weeks of focusing on him coming to you desperately in love, don't contact him, stay off social media and any time you get a negative thought, shut it down repeating "I know he loves me and wants me". 

I agree. His true colors definitely shown through last night. I was hoping that there would be a text message from him today possibly hearing an apology or even feeling bad for what he said, but nope, nothing. No remorse, no empathy, no guilt.... only says one thing narcissism/sociopathic. 

Blue wrote:

I definitely hope that you cut him off for good, wanderlusting. After making fun of you and mocking you, that shows he's just an abusive asshole and doesn't deserve anyone.

Blue that's a bit harsh. We are suppose to be supporting people to change they way they think so they can improve their life, not give up on them.

wanderlusting wrote:

I see stuff about Free Will all the time and I cannot help but believe it to be true especially if two people are wanting different things. What makes you think that Free Will is an illusion? I only mentioned vibrations because I am into Law of Attraction and the Spirituality realm of things. I have done PW for nearly 3 months now and I feel a lot of resistance from him still after this long. If you have a free moment, go and check out my post that I wrote about my current situation labeled "It worked....sorta!" I am needing advice big time on that one! 

 
This free will thing is giving me a hard time too. I seem to be unable to completely clear Mz. kind of it. As wanderlustig I constantly stumble upon the question: What if he just doesn't want me? If he is interested in someone else and wants to be with that person, that's his will, and that's his frequency, his vibration. Even if I am completely on the frequency of being in a wonderful relationship with him, how could we get together if we're not on the same frequency?