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| General Discussion "For Women Only" » Guy resurfaced after 20 years ......... » 10/22/2020 3:19 pm |
- Sybil
- Replies: 3
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ok wrote:Sybil wrote:Long story that I will keep short as possible. I was besotted with a boy when I was 19. He was a bit younger than me. He used to walk me home sometimes and we would kiss but he never asked me out. We would look quite longingly at each other in clubs and bars but it never turned into a proper relationship. This went on for about nine months and eventually he did ask me out, said he would call but never did. Next time I saw him, I froze him out and then eventually I started going to different places because it upset me too much to see him. This was before FB and social media.
My friend noticed him on Facebook about a month ago, and private messaged him. He didn't know who she was, but she asked him if he remembered her friend Sybil. He said he did, and he'd lost her number and wondered why she was so frosty towards him. I wrote about him in my diaries, how strongly I felt about him etc, and she's told him bits of this. He seems rather flattered by it and wondered why I wasn't more forthcoming towards him. The answer is I was scared and thought I was punching above my weight and he wasn't that into me. I probably thought he should have done the chasing.
I don't want to start anything up again now, it's too late and not appropriate, but I do think he was the one who got away and I was the same for him, and that we should have got together back then.
So my question is, would PW or BWD (prob not the latter) be appropriate to tell him how I felt then, so he finally gets the message loud and clear? And if so, how would I visualise? Now, or put myself (and him) in the position of back then?
It's very curious.what a really incredibly romantic sweet story!! why don´t you visualise or script him and you having a heart to heart where he confesses his feelings for you and you feel that Paradise feeling, and then you tell him how you always felt about him and you feel joyful comfortable and safe in doing so (i.e. you feel safe expressin
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| Questions & Answers » Cutting the Cord Queries and is it necessary in my situation? » 9/23/2020 9:22 am |
- Sybil
- Replies: 4
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Hi Lanie thanks. He has kept in touch with me daily but over the last couple of days, I have to be honest and say it is with less frequency and less content. I really don't know why because it all changed from such brilliant contact, along with good morning/goodnight messages to very little over the last week.
I have decided to stop contacting him for a while. Heard nothing today. I've stopped responding now, and feel I need to take some time out for things. Yes I am worried I will admit that. Would you advise doing the secret technique during no contact alongside zero actual real contact and not checking whether he has been in touch? What effect would that have and would it mess with no contact objectives?
| Questions & Answers » Cutting the Cord Queries and is it necessary in my situation? » 9/21/2020 3:33 am |
- Sybil
- Replies: 4
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I have now done that, Lanie, because I was starting to become anxious and worrying if he didn't pick up messages etc as there has been less interaction over this weekend and it has been raising alarm bells for me and making my mind go in overdrive, particularly when it has been so intense for some weeks. Instead of watching him turn and walk away, though, I turned and walked away myself, making it my decision.
I don't feel magically perfect after doing this though and I hope over the next few days I will start to feel better. I don't want him to feel anything negative in connection to me, or stop thinking of me. But if he wants me, he has to step up.
| Questions & Answers » Cutting the Cord Queries and is it necessary in my situation? » 9/17/2020 2:49 am |
- Sybil
- Replies: 4
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I would like to know a bit more about this before I actually try it and wonder if it is necessary. Long story short, reconnected with an ex from when we were 19 and 20. We broke up over a misunderstanding - this was many many years ago. We have been chatting a lot on Messenger for over two months now on a daily basis.
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It all started as general chit chat and catching up but then progressed with him taking the initiative at first. He has told me he cannot stop thinking about me, wishes I was there, says a lot of all the right things. He lives only 8 miles from me but works away (150 miles) in the week. He is the only one of my exes I have kept in my heart and was really the one that got away. But though he has messaged me several times a day, sent photos, requested me as a FB friend, messages several times a day with all kinds of messages (general stuff, about work, chit chat, football, some sauciness that I have tried to downplay at the moment and a voice message - albeit in response to mine) I want to a) speak to him properly on the phone and b) actually see him. I told him twice I want to actually have a proper phone conversation but he hasn't said anything about this.
I don't want a constant stream of messages and that be it. Neither do I want to nag. There is daily contact but I know I deserve more than just being in a text relationship! I was absolutely devastated when things didn't work out before and I know I was too passive with him. I don't want that this time, but neither do I want to be overly pushy either.
I started doing PW but I wondered about doing CTC because of me thinking negatively over the past week. For instance one of my friends says he is just doing this for a laugh, amusing himself because he is bored working away, he is probably a player, mucking me about, playing games etc. I then end up checking my phone to see if he has been in touch and if it is a short message, start worrying that he is "e-tethering" as my friend put it. Bu
| General Discussion "For Women Only" » Guy resurfaced after 20 years ......... » 7/20/2020 3:57 am |
- Sybil
- Replies: 3
-
Long story that I will keep short as possible. I was besotted with a boy when I was 19. He was a bit younger than me. He used to walk me home sometimes and we would kiss but he never asked me out. We would look quite longingly at each other in clubs and bars but it never turned into a proper relationship. This went on for about nine months and eventually he did ask me out, said he would call but never did. Next time I saw him, I froze him out and then eventually I started going to different places because it upset me too much to see him. This was before FB and social media.
My friend noticed him on Facebook about a month ago, and private messaged him. He didn't know who she was, but she asked him if he remembered her friend Sybil. He said he did, and he'd lost her number and wondered why she was so frosty towards him. I wrote about him in my diaries, how strongly I felt about him etc, and she's told him bits of this. He seems rather flattered by it and wondered why I wasn't more forthcoming towards him. The answer is I was scared and thought I was punching above my weight and he wasn't that into me. I probably thought he should have done the chasing.
I don't want to start anything up again now, it's too late and not appropriate, but I do think he was the one who got away and I was the same for him, and that we should have got together back then.
So my question is, would PW or BWD (prob not the latter) be appropriate to tell him how I felt then, so he finally gets the message loud and clear? And if so, how would I visualise? Now, or put myself (and him) in the position of back then?
It's very curious.
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