Thank you girls for your answers! I really need to get in a better feeling place! I'm working with self love affirmations and meditations. I just have immense problems creating the feelings of love and appreciation and worthiness during affirmations/meditations. And right now my feelings for my love are not very lovely but resentment and disappointment. The thought of him not caring for me at all etc is really painful. So I think I'll skip PW for a few days until I'm feeling more in love with him again. But I'm really happy that you think my hopes are not in vain and that I'm able to turn the situation around!

Hi Ladies!
I'm crushed... i just manifested one of my greatest fears... all the time i had hope that my POI really likes me because of the little things he did, like I told you, the may he looks at me, blushed when I touch him or when he touches me, strokes my cheek etc... and he really is a person known as highly correct and respected, someone who's not flirty or something... but doubts crept in, me thinking what if I'm just making that up, what if that's totally normal for him etc...and I always feared one day I would see him stroking someone else's cheeks or anything similar... and today, one of the other girls told me happily how lovely he stroke her cheek because she was bringing him a piece of her birthday cake... and the others around were like "what?!? He really did that to you" I didn't say anything about him doing this to me because I always thought he didn't care so much for everyone knowing about how close we are...so okay, I have the confirmation that this kind of flirty behavior is unusual for him but why the hell is he starting to do that to other too?!? Does it mean anything to him at all!!!
I could really need your encouragement and some advice too as how to proceed with that... of course I did PW on him letting him tell me that I'm the only one etc that he's not interested in anyone else etc and now I just got the opposite?!?! Please Help!!!

Thanx. That's an interesting point! Never thought about it that way!

Hi girls (and boys),
Yesterday I had quite a confusing situation with my POI and I really would appreciate your opinion on that... I'm trying to translate our conversation from German in English and hope it still makes sense...

So we are colleagues, we have a very close work relationship, and from the way he looks at me and the way he touches me, strokes my cheek softly etc, and from our text messages I'd say, he's into me and knows that i like h too... things are a bit complicated but I was quite sure that we are on our way to date and get together...

So Friday I was chatting with another colleague, let's call him R. And we were also talking shortly about my POI, let's call him T. (Of course no one at work knows abouty feelings for him) and R asked me jokingly if T and I had a bit of a tense relationship (tense relationship is "angespanntes Verhältnis" in german, whereas "Verhältnis" in german means also affair)
... I was surprised but maybe it was just a joke etc...

So after I had finished my work, T was still there, i gave him a call to whisk him a nice weekend and we came to talk about R. So I mentioned that R thinks we're having a tense relationship/affair... t starts laughing "oh are we having an affair?" I said I was more worried about "tense"... so he told me still laughing that's nothing he would talk about with someone else... I said well I don't hope things are tense between us... and he replied: "neither tense nor are we having an affair, or do we?" I was thunderstruck and said "well of course not, I should have noticed by now" after that we wished each other  a nice weekend and that was it...

And now I'm so confused, maybe I'm just paranoid but with his words I heard "we are not having an affair and we will never have one. I'm not interested in you... etc.." I talked to a friend about it,she thinks he was just joking with the words and that he didn't mean anything, and that I'm interpreting too much and that he still likes me... but I still think

Evey2222 wrote:

I am finally in a place of detachment and realising my own self worth! I have a date tomorrow night with a really nice guy, my love is still contacting me but until he steps up I am getting on with it.

If all these coaches have taught me anything its that self love is so important. Lanie, Veronica, Agnes, Neville, etc. Everyone I have watched and read, it radiates around self love! I am so grateful for my life and the people in it. I think having Reiki healing really helped clear some negative blocks as well, and also recently being more accepting towards things. 

I am finally having fun with the techniques, not worrying about what is going to happen and FINALLY accepting I am enough to be loved!! when you let go and open yourself to all possibilities it enables you to be free and not consumed with worry and anxiety (something that took me ages to beat!) 

Independant ladies we can do this haha!! thought I would spread some happy positive vibes to everyone!! 

xxxxxxxxxxx

 
This is so great to read! But how exactly did you do it! Especially the part to feel that you're enough to be loved and that you accept every possible outcome, getting past worries and anxieties...
I am so tired and fed up with everything right now... I am tired of being single and just can't stand the thought that I will be for another year or so... I want my life to change really bad and I feel like I'm wasting my time here waiting for something good to come while I'm getting older and older...
I could really use some self love, happiness and hope, that everything turns out positively...